My Journal

March 2

It has been a long stretch since I’ve added to this blog. I joined a bible study in my park which is very good. But that is the not the big news. . …I have decided to leave Richland Baptist Church and find another church. Today, I have realized I can not be close to God while I held criticism, resentment, disappointment and , yes, even anger and jealousy in my heart. Once I got rid of all that, the joy and excitement the the closeness of God returned.

March 13,2013

It is becoming easier now. I am getting used to the new church, getting to know a few people but mostly I feel comfortable now. I love the sermons, I like the Sunday school. It was a good thing I did. So I think the time has come to remove my membership from RBC formally by letter and join New Hope. I pray this is the right decision.

CHANGING DIRECTIONS IN LIFE IS NOT TRAGIC;

LOSING PASSION IN LIFE (GOD) IS.

LOOK FORWARD NOT BACK!

April 7, 2013

          Hallelujah!!Today I joined New Hope Baptist Church! What a wonderful day! I feel so certain that this is the choice God wanted me to make. The people there are friendly, welcoming and SOOOOOOOO dedicated to following Jesus. They have such deep, strong faiths. I sense that now I am truly in a body of believers! The message by the pastor is what I need. He preaches that we must stay strong in our faith in order to face and endure the trouble of the world we live in today. He shows us how to live in this world and how to prepare for even more disturbing times to come. He teaches Scripture and the truth of the Bible! In just the short time I have been attending the church (about 7 weeks) I feel that my faith has grown and deepened. I feel the closeness of Jesus and have experienced so many answered prayers in just these recent weeks. Praise God!!

May 7, 2013

I was sad at prayer meeting tonight. I am sorry because I did not trust God. I felt my life was changing and I prayed for God to tell me what he wanted me to do. Everything I WAS doing wasn’t working anymore. My faith was weak because I didn’t know what God expected of me. I felt confused and lost. I have been praying every day…God ,what is going on? What should I do? I felt there was a change coming but I didn’t know what it was.

May 26, 2013

Today Marie(church secretary) said that Pastor Don would like for me to write the daily devotions for the church website!!! Wow!!! More than I could ever expect, beyond my wildest dreams and an answer to my prayer to God for a task to do for him and/or the church.. WOW! The pastor is a genius and his mind and his writing is off the charts, yet he wants ME to write the devotions!! My writing is at a third grade level compared to his. WOW! It is also very scary! I have to write 31 devotions for the whole month of July! But, I have learned from the past that if God gives me a task, he will also give me the wisdom and skill to do it. Thank you God!! This feels like an answer to my prayer and is certainly a boost in my confidence. Praise, praise, praise God! But forgive me, Lord, me for not having the patience to wait for you to show me what to do. I pray that you will continue to lead me where you want me to go, to do what you want me to do, and teach me how to do it. Thank you dear heavenly Father.

July 31, 3013

I am so amazed! I was doing no Hospice work this summer and there was no school, no Bible study in the park, and the devotions were written. I’m wondering does God no longer have a plan for me? Well, it turns out he did have it all planned out for me. I just had to wait for it to develop on His timing. I was free this summer to help Ray and Mary. She was losing the battle with cancer and very sick from chemo. I was grateful I was free of other obligations so I could be with them and help them during this very difficult time.

          I look back over the decisions I have made these past few months and I can see God’s hand directing me in a direction where he wants me to go.

I know that as long as I pray for answers, as long as I strive to serve and please him, he will direct my life if I just ask for his help and continue to obey and love him. What an awesome God we serve! All he asks of us is to love, to obey and to trust.

October 2, 2013

Confusion:

My mind is changing as I study God’s Word, I see everything around me differently. I am more sensitive to people’s suffering, more attuned to world events, more aware of listening to God’s Word, that is, coming to a better understanding of the Bible. This is all good, but I feel so separated from people who can’t see or understand what I see and feel! I am comfortable and relaxed only with other believers! I don’t know how to deal with this. I am happy and contented with my life, I feel secure in the love of God and don’t have any desire to change anything in my life, except to be able to spend more time being with God, to learn more about how to live a life that is pleasing to Him.

Oh, sweet Jesus, how awesome you are!! I had just finished writing this last paragraph when the phone rang and it was a lady who needed someone to take her to the grocery store. I love this dear lady and I am so pleased to be able to help her and have a nice outing with her. Thank you God for giving me this opportunity to serve you. The timing of the phone call was so appropriate to make me feel good but also humble. It felt like an answer to a prayer. Thank you.